Day 41

So

I’ve been staring at my textbook for 2 hours and I’ve averaged 2 pages an hour. You do the math hahaha. Thought I should try taking a break to wake up a bit.

It’s SO cold today. The weather report lies. Or doesn’t consider ice cold wind into the equation. The other day I was thinking about how many times a day I check what the weather is really like at the current time. Like I need some validation for how I feel. . Hahaha kind of ridiculous but this happens all too often.

Anyway, I was in the library but I think they had the ac on or something because the ceiling was blowing cold wind in my direction. I decided to leave after about three hours because my hands were turning white. I decided to go to panera because they have a fire place. O yeah but now it’s so toasty I want to sleep hahaha! Hard to please, right?

What am I studying? I’m studying immunology at the moment. It’s really quite fascinating if you ask me just a bit more fascinating when I don’t have an exam coming up hahaha, you know how it is.

I was talking to my mom on the phone the other day and she was telling me about a lecture that she went to recently given by one of the famous monks in korea . She told me that someone asked the question about how he spends every day enjoying his job so much. The monk started to talk about night clubs.

Hahaha he prefaced this by saying that he hadn’t been to one, but from what he heard, people went there to dance and have fun. Agreed? Then he asked, “if you were hired by the club to dance there, would you still think that it was fun?” well, it would be fun for something like a day, but then it would stop being fun. Wouldn’t it? The monk said, “you see, the act itself hasn’t changed and still has the potential to be as fun, but you have changed your perspective about it.”

You can enjoy your job, just by changing your perspective about it. Presumably, we all bagan our jobs thinking that there is something that we would enjoy in it-whether it be learning  something new, making  something cool, or impacting some sort of change you wish to see in the world.

I think I forget this all too often–forget how I felt in the beginning going into projects or starting a new class.

Time to remember again I think, right?

Hope you can remember the beginnings again too. Have a great day

And  as always  dftba!

Day 40

Pink

happy weekend everybody!

dftba

Day 39

good morning

 

Tip-toe through the tulips with me

Day 38

some photos of Summer 2011. Wow, it’s almost been a year already…

 

 

Day 37

Wow, it’s been so long. I’ve moved, the seed I planted is now a mini tree, started a new job, ended a new job , and I’ve met so many new people–so much has happened.

I decided to write today to just to go over some things that I’ve been thinking about for a while. I think that it helps me organize my thoughts when I write to other people. So here it goes

If you know me at all, you know that I am interested in healthcare to say the least. And if you know me really well, you know of my dreams of changing our current system of care. Today I was looking at the blog of one of my heroes, Dr. Patch Adams, and reading about the new developments of the center he is creating and his views on how to solve the problems of our current system of care.

At times, I feel like the way he expresses his thoughts are a bit extreme, but that is also why I love his work so much. He is my hero because he is so passionate and sure about what he is doing and I think his ideas are great. He is brave enough to be an optimist–to believe that a change can be made and to not be pulled down by those who say his ideas are unrealistic. He believes in the common good of people, and so do I.

I am an optimist too. There, I said it.

Increasingly, as I get older, I feel that optimism is looked down upon, and in certain situations, I feel the pressure to agree with everyone that “life sucks”. I often find myself in conversations in which the person I am talking to acts like those who are optimists are naive ass-holes and I find myself wondering why. Why is it that if you believe in the possibility of something outside the norm, you are shot down for being unrealistic? Why is there this huge unnecessary pressure put on people who dream of change? Why do people shoot down ideas for being unrealistic and not help pose a solution?

I think ideas need time to be developed, and I don’t think that an idea should be shot down in the beginning stages of development. Even if an idea for change may be unrealistic to begin with, I think that in the effort of trying to begin to implement change, you can be taught how to make more realistic solutions that work. If people want to reject an idea, they should be able to pose a thought that will help make the idea better.

Of course–I am not saying that this applies to all ideas or that all ideas (i.e. Gingrich’s plans to form a colony on the moon) are good. hahaha but you know what I mean. I’m talking about ideas that aim to better situations for our society that we currently have no solid solutions to.

These days I find myself thinking a lot about this issue of optimism. I think for a while, a part of me felt that I need to be more pessimistic to be realistic–and for a while, perhaps I tried to make that change in myself–but it just isn’t who I am. I think that you can be both optimistic and realistic. This is a way to begin solving problems. Of course, I am not saying that this is the way that you have to be–it’s just what works for me. This is just my way of thinking–it can be different from your way of thinking, and that’s okay.

I’m not trying to preach to you I’m just putting my honest thoughts out there.

I think I am beginning to be okay again just being myself. In college, somewhere along the way, I think I lost a bit of this confidence. I went from the person who was always okay with just being myself to someone who was wary of how others would perceive me. I’m glad that I am beginning to be okay just standing on my own again.

I’m okay being an optimist, I’m okay being the girl who puts her thoughts out there for others to listen to, I’m okay with where I am headed and what I want to do in life.

…so that is an update on me and where I am now hahaha. I guess it was a bit heavy, but hey, I’m a heavy thinker–what can I say?

I hope all of you have been well! Send me an update sometime! I want to hear about how all of you are doing

until next time, DFTBA

Day 36

Hello! It’s about time for an update, right?

so I planted some cosmos seeds and they have been growing well which makes me happy because many of the plants that I’ve tried to grow ended up being returned to the soil hahaha. And I’m growing an avocado seed! super cool! I saw it on the movie Red and decided to try it out. You should give it a try too

 

my cosmos

here’s how I grew the avocado seed. sorry about the bad illustrations, did it in 2 min.

cool beans! better update soon

Day 35

Done with classes! yay~!

The spring has come and gone: